Today, I ventured over to the Swiss grocery store, Migros, to return a can of lentils and deodorant. It was my first attempt to return an item in Switzerland, and I was a bit nervous because I didn't know all the vocabulary I needed, and I wasn't sure what the return policies are at grocery stores in Europe. However, I was determined to take on the challenge because in a rush yesterday, I reluctantly bought an over-priced can of lentils that I didn't notice also had ham until I got home (I am a vegetarian), and I also broke down and purchased an equally over-priced deodorant, which I found for two euros less at a German store. As a volunteer, I need every frank and euro I can get.
So I walked into Migros, approached the info desk and used the non conjugated verb "to return" with an implied question make at the end as I handed the clerk the receipt and waited. After a curious glance in my direction she walked over to the intercom and asked for another employee to approach the counter. She then explained to me (in German) that while the deodorant is okay, they do not accept returned groceries, but she was going to make an acceptation because I had just bought it the day before. Since my nerves were already a bit rattled coming into the situation, I couldn't immediately recall any of my German, so I just apologized and nodded my head to convey I understood.
Then as an older lady approached wearing the signature Migros's red vest, I had this premonition, this gut reaction, that things were about take a turn for the worst. As she stepped up beside me and reached for the items on the counter, for a brief moment, I thought perhaps I was wrong and she was only going to collect the groceries to return the shelves without a word --I should have trusted my first instinct.
She picked up the lentils, turned to me and repeated that they don't accept returned groceries (and in my retelling, she had a very haughty tone). As she diligently checked the can, she asked why I was returning it. I still could not coherently express anything as my mind was drawing up blanks on all the German I had learned; at this point, I was only capable of "sorry," "please "and "thank you." So as I paused to think of what to say and how to say it, she repeated herself again until she understood that I didn't speak German well. And honestly, since the older lady approached, I was too tongue tied to say anything, so she hadn't heard me speak a word --only nod to show I understood.
As my lack of German skills became apparent, she looked at me and said, "You must speak English," which I in turn confirmed. She then turned to her Migros cohort repeating the statement. They then proceeded to ignore me as they ranted about me (in German) how I don't understand what they are saying and complaining about English speakers, and they had the gall to laugh. While I obviously couldn't recite verbatim what they said, I knew enough vocabulary and grammar to understand what they were talking about, and I was affronted because it was just all around rude behavior.
I hope it was apparent that I was annoyed because if it is not clear, I was. Eventually, the woman behind the counter handed me cash, as the older lady sauntered off with my returned lentils. I walked away with a half-hearted smile, and, resorting back to my eighth-grade emotional capacities, without a "thank you" --apparently everyone present hit a low moment this morning.
On the way home, I shouted, "I
ch verstehe," in the silence of my car --it wasn't until that moment, 10 minutes later, that my mind started functioning again and I remembered how to say, "I understand."